I really like to read the Eyre's column in the Deseret News. They have fabulous parenting advice and it is always so common sense and uplifting. This last one was about their youngest daughter and her experience watching her brother's children while they went to India. Needless to say, the job was tough and left her wondering at the end of a tough day, How in the world do parents do this? Here is what she said(in the bold print):
I spent the past week baby-sitting my brother's three small children. I am a seeker of all kinds of adventures, and this was one like no other. A glimpse into the trump-all adventure of parenthood.(I've experienced such glimpses before, but for some reason or another, this one was particularly poignant.)
Among other things, I kissed owies better, tried to soothe choruses of screams when I really felt like screaming myself, changed the most world's most epic stinky diaper (you are probably thinking, I have seen worse, but I honestly doubt it), drove to the elementary school in my nightgown, made a memory game and a chalkboard canvas out of the driveway, wiped up literally countless piles of spit-up, barely won the wrestling match in the pew during sacrament meeting, safely (but perhaps just barely) frequented the swimming pool and the school playground, sang lullabies, made pigtails, shook formula into bottles and desperately promised fruit snacks for good behavior.
Every night when the kids went to sleep at 7:30, I was exhausted. Knackered. It was fun, but there were flashes when the thought "I really can't do this!" ran through my head. It was crazy and it was so hard. These kids are so adorable and so good — and it was only a week! How do parents do it?
In the same week that the incredulousness of this query showed up for me repeatedly, I found the answer — in a tiny flake of split-second bliss where I felt what I'm sure is just a small taste of a certain brand of golden, liquid joy preserved for moms and dads. This is an emotion that would absolutely, absolutely propel a parent to keep doing what I did (the past seven days) week in and week out, no matter how crazy things got. It was miraculously and magnificently energizing and empowering and motivating and so, so, so beautiful.
I was sitting on the beach at San Juan Capistrano. The sun was saying good night with simple yellows and that lightest of blues. McKay, 5, was digging, silhouetted in front of the shimmering waves. Baby Cubby was sitting nuzzled to my left side, and 2-year-old Lyla stood in the sand holding my thumbs. I pumped my arms as her feet willowed into the beach and she giggled in the amber light. Her hair was wispy. Cubby's body was warm. McKay radiated the plain happiness of childhood. The hairs on my arms stood on end. The world stopped spinning. Just for a moment, just for that wildly beautiful moment, as if unable to contain such euphoria and such love.
I thank heaven that God has put into us this extraordinary but so human ability to love.
It was a fantastic, stretching, exciting, tiring, happy week.
I have some tough days...sometimes really tough. It has been that way for going on 8 years now, when we went from 1 to 3 kiddos in the blink of an eye. Sometimes I can hardly stand it and then there are some tears...sort of goes with the territory when you've hit the 5-kid milestone, but it's those beautiful, spiritual moments that keep me going. It's the way my baby, Leah smiles at me...or my son, Zach says, "I love you" with a hug just because...It's Gavin blowing me kisses while I sit in his Primary class...It's Tanner thinking I'm still cool enough to hang out with and sit on my lap...Or going with Megan on a girls night out...and countless more moments.
So I guess there was a reason President Hinckley used this quote:
"Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he's been robbed. The fact is that most putts don't drop. Most beef if tough. Most children grow up to be just ordinary people. Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration. Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise...Life is like an old time rail journey...delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas, and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride."
I for one, am truly thankful for my ride!
4 days ago
4 comments:
Jen, I am so blessed to call you my Friend. Love your guts! Thanks for sharing this.
Jen..you are amazing. I love how you find the greatest quotes. You are doing a great job. Yes indeed it is NOT easy...I too am grateful for those special moments that keep us going.
Thanks for the great quote! I so needed it today.
Thanks for the great quote! I so needed it today.
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